Peppermint Chai Christmas Eve

   I wish that I had all these posts about Christmas and getting ready for Christmas, but I don't.   The "Innernet," as D. and I call it has been touch and go for the last few weeks.  Sometimes even if it reads five bars it takes ten minutes to log in (and stay in!) and I don't usually have that long!  Brownie and Bud are still doing school and they don't want to focus (can you really blame them?) and BuggaBoo has learned how to crawl, and it takes not only two eyes to watch her constantly, but a whole person to keep her where she needs to be and to make sure she doesn't touch, eat, or throw up on anything she's not supposed to.  It's been a bit..um..demanding.  SO!  That's my story.  I'm stickin' to it. 

   Well, enough chit-chat.  Let's get down to business.  We decorated our tree a few weeks ago, and it's lovely.  It even has a strand of dancing/flashing lights on it!!!  Woo-hoo!  For as far back as I can remember, my family has had a strand of dancing lights to put on the tree, or last year, on the garland.  One of the coziest things for me at Christmas time is to just sit and watch them.  They mesmorize me.  Personally I hate how every tree you can buy in the States is pre-lit.  I mean, seriously?  Part of the fun of getting out the tree is watching and helping Dad struggle with untangling and testing the lights.  Then you get to put them on together as a family.  It's a team effort, and it's so rewarding!  Pre-lit trees are the pits.  You plug them in--ding!  All the lights are on, and they're just...on.  No flashing, no dancing, no slow fade.  Entirely without character.  Or personality.

   How in the world did I get onto that tangent?  Haha!  I don't feel strongly about it or anything!  Ahem, right.  Moving on.  I just finished wrapping my little presents for the family.  It's not much, really...if we had big stores and shopping malls nearby I would just love to run out and buy everyone lots of super nice things, but...we don't.  *Sigh*  I know Christmas isn't about presents, but I sure would love to just give crazily and wildly and watch their faces in the morning!  Jesus was right when He said it was more blessed to give than to recieve.

   It's getting so cold!  Jack Frost waited until December 21st to come this year!  But now that he's here, he is definitely here to stay!  I'm dressed in layers, and I'm wearing my hat in the house! 
   I am surrounded by poverty here in India.  So many people around me are cold, and they can't get warm.  I think of the village women here in their mud homes.  They're cold all the time, and their children are cold all the time.  They take cold baths outdoors, since they have no way to heat water.  They can't bundle up, or eat or drink something hot, or snuggle under wool blankets at night.  I can't imagine what it's like for the mothers to put all the clothes on their children and know that they are still cold.  I can't imagine feeling cold and hungry all the time, but that is their life in the wintertime.  It makes me look at all the things I have and think, "I live like a queen.  I have everything I could possibly need and so much more!" 

   I asked S. yesterday how she didn't get depressed with seeing all the need around her.  Obviously, you want to just rush to help everyone...but you can't.  You really can't.  So what do you do? 
   She thought for a moment, and she said, "Well, you cannot help everyone.  But you can't let yourself get cynical and think, 'Well, if I can't help everyone I won't help anyone!' "  She said, "You just look for the people around you and think, 'This person has a need.  What can I do to help meet it?'  And keep an open hand and an open heart.  All this stuff that I have isn't really mine at all.  I'm a steward.  It isn't mine to keep.  What can I give of it to bless someone else?' "
  
   Simple truth. Again, not easy, simple.  There is no easy answer to a question like that.  But I think the idea is to have an attitude of service, and a open heart who is willing to share.  Then I think God will guide us through the circumstances and specifics.  That is what I hope He will do for me--for the rest of my life! 

   This last week before Christmas I've really been missing my family.  I catch myself thinking about them all the time.  I keep wanting to say things to them, and feeling frustrated that a finicky computer is my only way to check up on them.  This is my first Christmas away from my family.  I've always known Christmas to be a time when many people feel torn between loved ones and friends, but this is my first time to really feel that way.  I love you, my family!  I miss you all! 

   I'm craving peppermint.  Each morning I think, "I sure would love a cup of sweet hot peppermint tea!"  But get this:  I wish I had some candy canes. 

*GASP*

   When I was little, every year I ended up getting candy canes right before Christmas.  You know, from Sunday School teachers and random people at church; that kind of thing.  I always felt a little exasperated at that because I didn't really like them that much.  They took so long to eat, too!  And I knew that for the next whole year when I looked into my can of where I kept my stash of candy I would find broken candy cane bits when I was craving chocolate...tragic.  But now I would like some candy canes.   I could grind them up and put them into my chai each morning.  Peppermint sounds wonderful right about now, even if it isn't chocolate. 

   I'm excited about tomorrow.  Not the way the children are.  I don't care what I get for Christmas.  I'm excited to give my little gifts to people.  I hope they like them.  They aren't much, but they're from my heart. 

   Isn't it wonderful?  God gave His very best for us.  His Son.  He didn't hold Him back when He had every right to.  And Jesus volunteered to come to earth---to pay for our wickedness and rebellion against Himself.  Scripture says He did not "count equality with God a thing to be grasped."

   What?

   He was God, and He had a perfect, joyus relationship with His Father, and with the Holy Spirit.  And yet He chose to come to earth as a servant...and as a ransom?  To pay for ungrateful, selfish people like us?  He wanted to bring us into a restored relationship with Himself and with His Father.  He loves us that much.  He gave His life, and then He rose up again and will one day return as King over all.  He promised that anyone who came to Him and asked for mercy because of His atonement could be His child, and that He would save them from His coming anger and judgement of sin.  He has made me His daughter.  How could I do any less than pour out my life for Him, since He held nothing back for me? 

   Seeing poverty here in my face reminded me that Jesus was born into poverty.  He wasn't born in a palace with servants all around.  It was humbling enough for Jesus the Prince of Heaven to come as a helpless, toothless, crying baby.  But He was born into poverty, into shame, into hardship.  He came giving a blessing wherever He went, and people rejected Him and eventually got so enraged against Him that they howled for His blood.  Why did He choose that?  For love.  Love for rebels and unkind, ungrateful people like me and you.  The Prince of Heaven became poor.  That fills me with awe.  And with gratitude.  If Christ loves me like that than why am I afraid of anything in this life? 

   He loves you like that.  If you don't know Him, than please pray to Him and ask Him to forgive you because of His sacrifice.  He will if you ask Him!! 

   Sooo.  Hope this post hasn't been too cliche.  That's what's on my heart.  Here's a song I'd like to share with you.  "Peppermint Winter," by Owl City. 

           Merry Christmas to you all! :D

~Cadenza 

Winter

  It seems to me that Winter has been given a smear by the general public.  I can't give you real proof of that idea; it just seems that way to me.  In the poems and songs, usually Spring and Summer are extolled.

  "The flowers that bloom in the spring--tra-la!
    Bring promise of merry sunshine!
    As we merrily dance and we sing--tra-la!
    We welcome the hope that they bring--tra-la!
    Of a summer of roses and wine,
    Oh, a summer of roses of wine..."

   (I did NOT make that up, in case you were wondering!!)  Anyway, you know what I mean.  Spring is always a good time in the stories, and Summer is usually even better.  Now Autumn is generally thought pretty good.  Sometimes you come across "a golden autumn," in the stories.  Everyone loves pictures of the trees when they turn their magnificent colors.  Autumn is my favorite season of all.  Living where I do, I have never really seen an Autumn in its full glory, but every year I love it when it comes.  The crisp coolness that comes in the air seems to make everything inside me jump to life again.  The leaves as they begin to turn their own special colors thrills me, and ohhh, the smell of a wood in Autumn--!  Have you ever taken the time to notice that particular smell of the leaves, combined with the chilly air at Autumn?  I love everything about Autumn.  The cooler air, the falling leaves, the smells, the acorns, the appearance of jackets and winter clothes again...I love it all.  To me it seems like rebirth and a time of rejuvination.  The whole earth seems to be getting excited and busy and happy, and it fires through my veins until I just have to become part of it all, or I'll burst! 

   So, that's spring, summer, autumn, and now winter.  Of course everyone loves Christmas, but after December, it seems that people are immediately tired of cold weather.  Most everyone I talk to is so "tired of this dreary weather," or it "depresses them."

   Now I'm not trying to be irate or anything here.  To each his own.  Some people just don't like cold weather.  I understand that.  I don't like hot weather that much.  I just find it interesting that people love Christmas and its season and then immediately want the warmth of spring again.

   Further note, I know what it's like to get sick of Winter.  I remember my senior year of high school after Christmas, I could hardly bear to look out the window.  I was so stressed, so worried about everything, and so hopelessly busy that when I looked out at the wet brown grass, the naked branches of trees, and the steely gray sky, all I felt was fear.  I couldn't stand it.  It reflected what I felt inside instead of helping me feel better.

   But may I just offer you a new perspective of Winter?

   Winter is the frosty air, and the keen winds that nip your cheeks and nose when you step outside.  I love that, as long as I'm bundled up well enough.  I love the sting of the wind in my face, because of the way it makes my blood dance in my veins.  I'm alive, and I know it.  I feel alive, to the very core of my being.  I love to run in that wind.  It makes me feel adventurous, like some wild thing.  I want to run with the wind, to feel that I am a part of the wind instead of fighting against it.  Sometimes I feel if I could only run fast enough, the wind would bear me up and sweep me far away.
  
   Let's look around, shall we?  The gray sky.  The vast gray sky with no boundaries.  It's a sky under which anything could happen.  Look at the black branches of the trees sillhouetted against it.  For a moment, just forget all prejudices you have against that, and just look at the beauty of it.  The sharp angles, the clear-cut angles, like looking through the wrong end of a telescope.  Watch them waving in the whistling wind.  Do you feel the excitement?  Even the trees seem restless.  It's as if everything is inviting you into some great adventure. 

   Have you ever been walking through the woods on a winter day?  Have you ever taken time to notice the wildness of everything?  The outdoor world is still not tamed, and I'm glad it isn't.  Winter reminds you of that.  You see the bare bones of nature, and they are strong and unafraid.  Now, imagine that instead of being frightened of that, you go out into it as a friend, wanting to be a part of it all.  Appreciate the hardness of nature in Winter as well as its gracious invitation in Springtime.  Nature cannot really teach you any specific lessons, but being out in it is refreshing to the mind and the soul.  I love the beauty of Winter, even without the lovely snow, because I love the feeling of adventure and excitement.

   Have you been outside on a Winter's night anytime recently?  I envy people who live up North who can see the Aurora Borealis from their own backyards.  One day I want to see those lights myself.  But go outside as dusk is falling.  I'm always amazed at how such angular, bony branches can cast such long, soft shadows at dusk.  Dusk is my favorite part of the day.  When the sun and moon are in the sky together, and light and darkness mingle together.  Dusk is about harmony, and I love that part of the day most.  Everything is peaceful at Dusk, and I love the colors of a sunset.  In Winter, the twilight hour is cold, but still gracious and soft, in its own way.  And when the sun sets and the stars come out--!  I can never feast my eyes enough on the frosty stars that shine out so clearly in the Winter.  I love to see stars peeping through the bare branches of trees.  Do you take the time to notice the stars?  Never be in such a hurry that you don't have time to notice the stars at night. 

   Where I live, we don't get a lot of snow in the winter time, but when we do, I am always spellbound when I watch it fall.  I love to admire the shadows on the snow, or the moonlight reflected on it.  I don't get to see that very often, so it's extra special when I do get to see it.  Or seeing the woods behind my house transformed when the snow falls.  But of course, there are songs about enjoying the world when there is snow on the ground. 

   If I had some kind of condition and the doctor told me I would have only one Christmas left, do you know what I'd want to do?  After our church's Christmas Cantata which always falls on the second Sunday of December, I would have our family pack up and rent a cabin somewhere further up north.  Perhaps in Colorado.  Just somewhere remote and really comfy and spacious and--country.  I would want an old-fashioned Christmas, with cutting down a tree from the woods nearby.  Some days we'd go skiing, some nights we'd go on real sleigh rides, and every day we'd play in the snow and explore the woods and take long walks, and go sledding, and go ice-skate together on a huge frozen pond.  Some nights we'd drive far away and go carolling all around.  Maybe we'd even drive to a big city and admire the lights and decorations and go shopping.  We'd all cook delicious food and tons of desserts together and we'd all help with the work.  Every night we'd sing Christmas carols around the fire and tell funny stories until our stomaches hurt.  And we would all be merry and childlike and content.  And Christmas morning we'd maybe have some gifts for eachother.  That would be nice, but Christmas isn't about presents.  That's what I would love to do if I knew I had one Christmas left on earth. 

   Okay, that's not where I expected this post to go, but I hoped you enjoyed it.  Till next time, then!

~Cadenza